That was our prompt last night at EDGE. Honestly, the answers came easily, for this forty-five year old who has wrestled most of her life with this. Too long, the answer seemed to be a WHAT, but now, I understand the answer is a WHO. The question is not, “What is God calling me to do?” but “What is God calling me to BE?”
So, I wrote feverishly, before clarity escaped me. And now, I offer you, in no particular order of importance:
1. Share what I perceive through the eyes of my spirit. (Write, record and relay.)
2. Work to right wrongs, to realign skewed systems, to build models, processes and people who do likewise.
3. Live free of expectations ( especially mine), save God’s, via worship, expression and relationships.
4. Build Team where convergence has come.
a. Press some great talents/gifts forward. You know who you are. I keep telling you things like, “write that book,” “write the song,” “press your perspective.”
b. Support and guide some great hearts. You know who you are. I pray for you and listen for you and help you with those dreams and visions.
c. Serve the lives that grow in my care: my kids and “my” kids. You know who you are. If you are a kid or a quasi-adult and I feed you or eat Cheezits with you or birthed you, you qualify.
d. In this season, I am to develop some curriculums, for Worship Experiment, (probably) Beachfreak and for EDGE and Bible class at school.
I am to be me, in this season, often as a teacher, but not entirely so. I am learning to be me everywhere. To more and more so, do those things I do well and with passion and grace. I’m not nearly so interested in how I might be compensated in this life. That is the least of things and often the greatest trap to self and hindrance to the manifestation of call.
Last night, I sat in shock as I heard one of the finest young men that I know share how a season of working alongside of me at our restaurant helped him to settle in himself and discover more about who he was. He had previously attended a ministry training school and wasn’t sure which direction to go. He washed dishes and served food and cut carrots with me. Sometimes he made catering runs. I didn’t expose him to great teaching or experience, I didn’t have many heart to hearts with him. I was personally under great stress and may have been depressed at the time. I was frustrated and angry on many fronts. But, even under such circumstances, who I am somehow managed to work itself free and impart a bit of something which has well flooded into me and manages yet to flood forth: vision. I am a seer. I see things and press them with my person, if not my words. I force things forward. Somehow, even at my worst in so many ways, the call of my life continued.
That young man now works with me to does likewise in the lives of so many that I most love.
What is God calling you to?